Dear Homegrown Reader,
If we had to put Valentine’s Day as a feeling, I would probably say that it’s like watching someone rip the bandage apart from a wound. Slow, painful, and an unnecessary reminder of the pain you had mostly come to terms with. It’s like hearing someone standing next to you with a megaphone shouting “Guess what, you are all ALONE.” No one needs a capitalist hallmark celebration to make us feel that way ( as if the ‘all lonely people take longer hot showers’ memes exposing our sense of placating loneliness with warmth weren’t enough).
While it can feel like a lonely ride into thoughts like, “Will I end up alone in life?”; “Maybe I shouldn’t have broken up?”; “Has (that person) texted back yet?” or “Are they sharing our songs and memories with omeone else now?” especially since everyone around us seems to either be getting married or taking a vacation with their boo. Know that you have way too many co-passengers on this ride called loneliness. In fact, the loneliness epidemic hit us all a long time back.
But don’t worry, your fellow passengers have got your back, after breaking-up in the pandemic they have just the tricks to mend your broken heart.
“The heavy pain of separation in its true sense is supremely difficult to describe. The world can create countless ‘How To Deal With A Break Up’ guides, and yet, you will find yourself lost in a sphere full of suggestions. Breakups are capable of draining you — but an aspect we must keep in mind is that they also play the role of reintroducing yourself to you.”
— Break-Ups In A Pandemic: Young Indians On How They Tried To Mend Their Broken Hearts In A Lockdown
While you’re at this pity party, get to know more about your most trustworthy ally. If there is one thing that has witnessed all the heartbreaks, it has to be every heartbroken lover’s companion, the good old Old Monk. Always easy on the pocket, it still smells of the first time it was sneaked into the hostel probably with a pack of cheap cigarettes for the first-ever drinking escapade with friends, of the first night of drinking alone on the terrace after that college breakup, of the first time it was ordered with coke and a twist of lime at dinner, and of so many firsts for so many different generations.
Just in case you’re feeling experimental in your quest to drown away the sorrows, stir up this mean Jamun cocktail or perhaps get your hands on May & Co.’s Syrups & Shrubs (maybe the shrubs might help shoo away the curse of loneliness).
Not in the mood of drinking alone? There’s nothing a warm cup of tea can’t solve. In fact, I would honestly prefer waking up to a cup of tea than to someone’s face!
I can’t promise that divine intervention will cure you of your loneliness or sadness but this bovine intervention might just be able to help your touch-starved soul!
Don’t trust my rather bizarre claim? Well, cow cuddling has been embraced by the Dutch for a decade and might actually be the much-desired calm you require (bonus: India’s obsession with the holy cow means the gaushaalaa visit will be free (very much like the trauma that came out of your last relationship!)
“Stressful lives have caught us all in a spiral and many are hitting their nearest gaushalas for a free therapeutic session with cows. While I’m not as sure about whether I would signup for the bovine therapy, in a touch-starved world and one where therapy is quite expensive, maybe cow-cuddling (as strange as it might seem) will be the new bovine, err... divine touch we run to hoping it doesn’t kick us back!”
— Cow Cuddling Is The New Lifestyle Trend Taking The World By Storm
I’m not going to force you to get out if all you want to do is crawl under your blanket or maybe even grab a bowl of ice-cream as you binge-watch Netflix. But who needs the added pressure of selecting what to watch especially on a day when the world seems to be caving in?
Don’t worry, I’ve got just the recommendations for your various moods– movies to watch when in denial, when stuck at home or when you need something life-affirming.
If nothing else seems to be working, maybe binge-watch Indian Matchmaking and thank your stars that Sima Aunty is not looking for a person you can compromise with, in the holy name of blissful marriage!
If you’re someone like me who loves to binge-watch food shows every time life inconveniences you, check out Delhi Food Walks, as they discover the street food of India.
My dear reader, I’m parting with you now with a bonus small story (which you most certainly did not ask for but here it is anyway).
There is a centuries-old Japanese art– Kintsugi, or Kintsukuroi, the art of fixing broken pottery or ceramic bowls with gold. Once repaired, the gold glint in the cracks continues to serve as a reminder of the object’s unique history, celebrating the fractures and breaks instead of disguising it thus, enhancing its beauty. Think of the loneliness and sadness that breaks your heart as something that can be repaired with the gold of self-care, self-love along with friendships and community that will add to your beauty, a reminder of your own unique history.
There’s nothing else that compares to listening to a track (all by yourself or perhaps staring out some non-existent window) pretending to be the lead in your own film. Wait, we’re no Spotify but we’ve definitely got a playlist for that, and true to brand it’s all Homegrown.
If you like this article, we suggest you also read: