As much as we wish sheer willpower could banish the aches and sorrows of hangovers to a distant reality, we’ve had a minimal to zilch success rate with that personally; so we turn to our next best option: some greasy, mouth-watering grub to take away the pain. As you crawl out of wherever you’ve woken up dishevelled, head spinning, nauseated at the sight of your own toes – chin up, soldier. Yes, you went a little overboard - and yes, you are totally ‘never drinking again’ – but let’s get you back in your finest form before you overcommit in the haze of last night’s aftermath.
As you hear your stomach make unreal rumbling noises, you’ll realise beastly cravings are rearing their heads in harsh daylight of the Sunday - nothing but exactly what you want will do, and you need it right now. Tend to that monster before the sun gets even brighter, and the streets noisier - your appetite should be your priority in these difficult times, in search for a little something that hits just the right note.
As you reach, groaning, for your toothbrush, here are fantasies of food that beckon to you with promises of feeling good as new, a couple of dishes that we wish would materialise in front of us to save us from the jaws of post-alcohol blues:
I. Pizza Pot Pies
It’s so nice, you’ve got to do it twice. The pizza pot pie is literally a pizza topped by another pizza, a deep-dish delight with oodles of meaty goodness. Italian sausages, peppers and onions call out to you, but only after you’ve made it through the sinful pepperoni layer topping that first.
II. Breaded Steak Sandwich
The breaded steak sandwich has managed to incorporate the ingredients of what might well be the holy grail of hangover remedies - skirt steak is breaded and then fried, the sizzle the soundtrack to your healing, and then topped off with a layer of melted cheese to make you groan, peppers and a tangy tomato sauce making for a masterpiece between breads that sets the wrongs right.
Nothing like comfort food to usher you back into a sober existence, and shake off the previous night’s shenanigans. A piping hot bowl of tonkotsu ramen laced with shichimi togarashi, a medley of Japanese spices, dominated by dried and ground red chillies will have you crying at the healing power of grub, and possibly thinking about all the good things in life.
This dish draws upon influences from Israeli, North African and Berber flavours to combine knowledge from all over the world in the pursuit of hangover remedies. Eggs and the hot, aromatic harissa, a red chilli pepper paste, take the limelight in this beauty with the protein and fat density drawing swords against the afflictions of alcohol and the heavily-spiced tomato sauce giving body to the treat that is destined to save you.
We should all know by now that spicy does the trick - beef-laden spicy American chilli just had to feature on this list for this reason. Regardless of whether you’re making it at home, or ordering takeout, this one’s sure to make you sweat the night’s nastiness out.
VI. Waffle-Crusted Fried Chicken & Waffles
Sometimes you just need to do things a certain way to be happy in life. Think about this dish as one of those - salt, spices and garlic dance around chicken wings which are then dipped generously in buttery waffle crumbs and fried till golden-brown and crisp. Try not to cry as you crunch into your first glorious bite.
VII. Deep-Fried PB&J & Banana Sandwich
The classic peanut butter, jelly and banana sandwich is a perennial favourite for some - but it doesn’t always cut it when you have a hangover to get rid of. So why not put a twist on it - having it deep-fried till golden, and topped off with a sprinkling of white sugar, should hit the spot just right.
VIII. Bacon, Egg and Cheese Sandwich
This has got to be the ultimate classic - the bacon juggles the crispy-greasy ratio, as the scrambled eggs (don’t think twice if you want them fried intead), an incredible layer of melting cheese and buttered bread are dished up to you, toasted till golden. This mother of all sandwiches will have you walking out, taking off your shades and going, ‘Hello, world.’
IX. Crab Mac n Cheese
We just can’t seem to rid ourselves of our obsession with cheese. So we decided to throw in some seafood into the party - cheddar, Parmesan and Swiss will sing from your bowl as they are blended into some macaroni pasta and crabs, before being baked into a masterpiece. That first sweet bite of slightly burnt cheese will have you feeling like a rockstar.
X. Cheese Fries with Bacon
After a while, you know the key ingredients you’ve got to go for when looking hangover cures - crispy fries, deep-fried just right, covered in a drool-worthy layer of cheese which is, in turn, coated in a crispy layer of bacon sounds like something that’d be right up our alley.
XI. Fatty Sandwiches
Roast beef, onion rings, fries, brown gravy and mayo with mozzarella sticks bombard you in a package that packs a punch in this monster meal of a sandwich. Say goodbye to your cravings for the next few hours at least!
XII. Hawaiian Hots
This one can brighten up a hardline pessimist’s day with its combination of ingredients - a hot dog topped with the goodness of teriyaki pork, crushed avocado, pickled red onions await, coated in a spectacular layer of Cotija cheese.
[caption id=”attachment_21069” align=”aligncenter” width=”640”] Hawaiian Hots : Image Source- Damndelicious.com[/caption]
XIII. Fried Chicken Sandwich
Guess sandwiches really have set the bar for breathing life into hungover mornings, as long as they get the ingredients just right. This one’s definitely got the right idea with pimento cheese, bacon, bread and butter pickles and lettuce accompanying the fried chicken, topped off with a fried egg all bundled up in a warm, grilled bun.
XIV. Heart Attack Poutine
This Quebec speciality is best eaten in large bowls, preferably ending with you licking the bowl clean - it is just that good. This simple but mind-blowing medley combines French fries, a light brown gravy-like sauce and cheese curds that can be made even better - if such a thing were possible
- by throwing in chunks of sausage that’ll sort you right out, soon as you inhale this hefty hangover remedy.
XV. Mt. Fuji Burger
This one will make even those most carefree with their diet take a moment just to admire the audacity of the feat. A beef patty, chicken breast and a pork cutlet no longer need to be mutually exclusive - in fact, they come in a heart attack of a package that has all three types of meat tempura-battered and then deep-fried. Cheddar cheese, pepper Jack and bacon then make an entrance, rounded off with some spicy mayo, wasabi mayo, tonkotsu sauce, a fried egg and vegetables. Take a deep breath before you bite into this beast - you’re probably going to need it.
XVI. Overflowing Dessert Skillet
So there’s the meal-like remedies, and then there’s the desert delights that’ll have you feeling all right. Cookies, ice cream and whipped cream are assembled in the skillet to the best of one’s ability, before being sprinkled with crumbled energy bars and drizzled with chocolate or caramel sauce to make what can only be modern art. What’s that about a sweet tooth, now?
XVII. The Triple Coronary Bypass
This one makes even the likes of us balk at its sheer size/greasiness/cheesiness. And yes, beefiness. Three burger patties, three fried eggs, 14 slices of cheese and a whopping TEN pieces of bacon all cosying up between two grilled cheeses are served on a bed of fries and tater tots wrapped lovingly in a jaw-dropping layer of cheese sauce. Once you’ve had this one, there’s no going back.